How to Create a Table Plan That Won’t Cause Arguments
Once a bride messaged me on Instagram and asked, “How do I create a table plan for my wedding that won’t cause any arguments??” I thought this was a great question that other couples might be asking themselves too so here’s a blog based on my experience and what table plan worked for OUR wedding!
Our guest list included over 170 people and I wanted to keep to the American tradition of feeding EVERYONE who attended our wedding day. This, of course, meant we had a lot of people to arrange and seat in a way that wouldn’t cause problems or arguments! There are 3 main things we did:
First, grab your seat!
The biggest change to our table plan was that we chose NOT TO HAVE A TABLE PLAN AT ALL.
This was probably one of the most freeing decisions we made in our wedding planning. We didn’t have to spend hours moving names around on a cardboard table plan mockup late at night. We didn’t have to worry about relationship tensions and or about whether or not we were going to cause problems by sitting this person next to that person and so on. Joel and I simply got rid of the table plan altogether and invited everyone to find a seat, at whatever table they wanted!
In all honesty, this worked SO well because a last-minute change of plans (thanks to the weather) meant we had to seat everyone inside in several different rooms. There wasn’t a room inside big enough to seat all 170+ people. Either way, I think the table plan would have gone out the window eventually!
Not only was this a good decision for us logistically, but it meant our friends could be seated on a table they might not have been otherwise and get to know each other. It meant a lot to us that our friends from different chapters of our lives would meet and this was a great way to do that.
Second, designate the VIPs!
There is a wedding tradition of seating your parents, maid of honor and best man at a head table with the bride and groom. You might have guessed it… we broke this tradition!
With some complicated family relationships, we wanted to make it as stress-free for us and also our family members who had to find somewhere to sit. So, we designated the nearest tables to our head table for family members (we didn’t specify which family members) and seated our bridal party at the head table with us. This meant family members would still be sitting close to us and they could also sit with their respective partners. It also meant Joel and I could sit beside our siblings who were in our bridal party and this was really special for us.
In case you’re wondering how we managed the speeches with this seating arrangement (or lack thereof!) each person took their chair outside and we had our speeches in the garden under fairy lights. This was also the perfect solution for having had seated everyone in different rooms inside and it worked out great!
Third, get in line!
Also commonly done at weddings is having a 3-course wedding breakfast served to you and your wedding guests while seated. There are allergies and dietary requirements to cater for and this can get complicated when feeding a lot of people.
If you decide to have a 3-course sit-down meal your caterers will need to know who has what dietary requirement and where they are seated. This has been done many times before, but we wanted to save the stress and hire a family friend’s catering company to feed the masses with a delicious buffet!
Now, I know what you’re thinking. When I hear the word ‘buffet’ I think of finger-picky foods that have been deep-fried and everything is BEIGE. But… it doesn’t have to be this way! With experienced caterers, you can have a fresh, colorful and delicious meal that meets everyone’s needs and without creating a table plan.
Designate a groomsman or MC to invite each table up to the buffet one by one. Once each table has been served you can then make a call for seconds if there are any! I can testify first hand that this can work well if you’re organized. ;)
So how to create a table plan that won’t cause arguments?
- Invite your guests to seat themselves and meet new people
- Reserve close tables for your VIPs
- Hire an experienced catering company to provide a delicious buffet
Do YOU have any tips on how to create a table plan from your own wedding planning experience? I would love to hear them. Please do comment below!
Also, to see more from the gorgeous wedding at The Perch in Oxford, click here!
Table Plan / Table Numbers / Place Names: Appointed Designs
Flowers: The Great Little Flower Company
Favors: Harry Spectres
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